moving on...

i watched PRIME last night @ galleria with elaine (b4 b4 pa hehe) and jpmelo. i super enjoyed the movie.u should watch it kase maganda, di ko ikwekwento promise hehe... basta it was about a great love not meant to be; laugh trip pero ang bigat lang din kase biglang seseryoso., it was also about moving on and accepting that sometimes love alone is not really enough, napa bilib lang talaga ako sa ending.. ang sakit pero very real..

sabi ko tuloy sa sarili ko na ako rin..give up nako, i've moved on, he's not worth it. forget ko na ang love na hindi naman naging reality. i'm okay. i'm okay.

pero iba rin ang tadhana noh? late this afternoon someone from a recent past texted me after more than a week na non-text. parang may nag-tetest sa akin na , sige nga kung over ka na talaga, prove it, move on. para bang it was my chance to really go ahead and get a life.. pero haaaay.... kahit paano ko pilitin yung sarili ko-- super vague pa rin ang reply ko sa text, kahit gusto kong sabihin na, sige i'll go, bat ba choosy pako eh okay na naman dapat..di ko pala kaya.

i asked myself, bakit ba? tapos na realize ko there's still a part of me na nag-hahang on pa rin sa isang microscopic hope na may chance pa with the one i supposedly gave up on.. kainis kase ang unfair. what if hanggang dun na lang pala? what if dahil sa paghihintay ko, napapalampas ko na pala ang mga bagay/tao / pagkakataon na yun pala ang talagang magpapasaya sa akin?

unfair talaga. parang sinasadya na kase eh, paulit-ulit na lang, kung kelan ko pa natanggap na kaya ko na, tsaka parang pinatunayan sa akin na hindi pa pala, kahit ilan pa ang dumating sa buhay ko, unfair dahil yun at yun pa rin ang iniisip ko...

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masochist ramblings from the internet...

The only true painful good-byes are the ones that are never said and never explained.

How could you forget me and so easily walk away, when I'd give up a thousand tomorrow's for just one yesterday

I say that I hate you because that’s what I want to believe. But deep down inside I know that no matter how much you hurt me, I’ll always forgive you. And I’m always going to be here waiting for you. For you to realize that what we had is real, and that you do need me as much as I need you. I know this may take time, but don’t worry I’ll be patient

You're not worth the tears. You're not worth the heartache. I don't know why I give you the time. You're not worth the pain. You're not worth the emptiness. I don't know why I wish you were mine

ItZ AmAzIn HoW SoMe 1 CaN BrEaK Ur HeArT-
BuT YoU CaN KeEp LuViN' ThEm Wit EvErY BrOkEn Bit